uk
enJust kid`in
Girl, to boyfriend, `Do you think I`m vain?` Boyfriend, `No. Why do you ask?` Girl, `Because girls as good-looking as me usually are.` Детальніше
Wife: Have a look at the cake. I`ve decorated it for my birthday party. Don't you think my sense of design is wonderful? Husband: (counting the candles) Well, it`s certainly better than your arithmetic.Детальніше
A cop pulls over a car full of nuns. Cop: Sister, this is a 65 MPH highway – why are you going so slow? Sister: Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 22, not 65. Cop: Oh sister, that`s not the speed limit, that`s the name of the highway you`re on!Детальніше
The frightened tourist: «Are there any bats in this cave?» The guide: «There were, but don`t worry, the snakes ate all of them.» to frighten - лякати cave - печера snake – змія Детальніше
Tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. Is it true, he asked, that an alligator won`t attack you if you carry a flashlight? That depends, replied the guide, on how fast you carry the flashlight.Детальніше
Angler: You`ve been watching me hours. Why don`t you try fishing yourself? Onlooker: I haven`t got the patience. аngler- рибалка, риболов оnlooker - глядач, спостерігач patience - терпіння, терплячість Детальніше
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said, «Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?» To which the farmer replied, «Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!Детальніше
Two men got out of their cars after they collided at an intersection. One took a flask from his pocket and said to the other, «Here, maybe you'd like a nip to calm your nerves». «Thanks», he said, and took a long pull from the container.Детальніше
Two men were going in a train. One of them asked the other: "Are you going to Brown`s lecture today?" "Yes. I am", said the other. "Take my advice and don`t go", said the first, "I hear he is a very bad lecturer." "I can`t help it", said the other.Детальніше
